Gross Stories
WASPS
About 7 am on August 25th 1998, thirty-six year old Mrs Sarah Jenson started her period. By the time she arrived at work an hour later, she had started to experience a chronic itching sensation in her crotch. Sarah worked as an advisor in a call centre and had recently received a final warning about her poor attendance record. To keep her job, she tried to ignore the itch and got on with answering customers calls. At 11:25am she reported to her boss that she was suffering from severe abdominal pain and it was only when she collapsed in her own vomit that he called for an ambulance. She was admitted to the Lincoln Hospital, Texas where doctors discovered that her vagina was greatly swollen and her labia had distended to three times normal size. Whilst cleaning the inflamed area, a tampon was found and it was sent away for analysis. Suspecting Toxic Shock Syndrome, Sarah was kept under close observation until her condition was no longer critical. One week later the Lab results on the tampon arrived and doctors were baffled to find that it contained traces of wasp venom. It transpires that Sarah was having an affair with her aerobics instructor, and when her husband Mr Henry Jenson found out, he was so enraged he wanted revenge. Knowing his wife was allergic to insect stings,he purchased wasp venom through a biochemical company. He lightly coated his wife's tampons with the venom, resealed the individual wrappers and replaced them in their box. Mrs Jenson has filed for a divorce and a case of grievously bodily harm. Mr Jenson is reported as saying, "I just wanted her to have a swell time without me." COCKROACHES In March 1997, Brian Crenshaw, a chemical engineer from West London, returned to the UK after spending the previous six months overseeing work at a petrochemicals plant in Nigeria. During his first week back, his wife complained that he seemed to have difficulty listening properly. Brian suggested that his ears had not fully recovered from the air pressure changes experienced during his flight. Over the next two weeks, Brian's condition worsened as he started to feel tickling sensations deep in his ears. Thinking the trouble was caused by loosened ear wax, he attempted to clean his ears with a ballpoint pen. When he pressed it into his right ear, he heard a cracking sound and saw the pen covered in a yellow goo. He went to his local GP claiming he had punctured his ear drum. The GP reached into Brian's right ear with a pair of tweezers and pulled out what appeared to be an insect antenna. During the examination Brian was horrified to learn that he had a total of 5 African cockroaches living in his head. Four cockroaches were alive and one cockroach was dead, presumably crushed by Brian's pen attack. An investigation revealed that when Brian was in Nigeria, a female African cockroach must have laid numerous eggs in the toiletries bag where he kept his cotton buds. When he was cleaning his ears, he was also transferring the cockroach eggs to his inner ear where they started to hatch.
BLACKWIDOW
On September 4 1999 at 9.30 am Ron Guptey of N.S.W Australia went into hospital complaining of severe pain in the rectum area. The doctor on call examined his swollen anus but was left puzzled because he had not seen such a thing before. Two more doctors examined him and they too were left confused about what was happening. Rons health was deteriorating as the day wore on, he developed a fever and was suffering a lot of pain around his abdomen. The doctors gave pain killers but the symptoms worsened until 2.57 pm when he lapsed into a coma and 2 hours later was pronounced dead. An investigation was led to discover the reason of death. During the post mortem, traces of wood bark were found inside the rectal passage, but as the examination went further the doctor discovered about 3 or 4 black widow spiders in Ron's intestine. The police found a tree with a cut of branch along the side in Ron's back yard, there were traces of KY jelly and traces of rectal juices along the branch. There were also Black widow egg shells found inside the bark. Ron was apparently satisfying himself with this tree stump, but failed to notice the black widow nest on the tree. During his sexual act he had impregnated himself with the black widow eggs. The eggs had embedded in his rectal passage walls and were kept at the required temperature for the eggs to develop and finally hatch. Once the baby spiders were hatched they had bitten him and had poisoned him from the inside. Guess he was barking up the wrong tree.....
THE LOBSTER
Susy DeLucci and the Miracle of Life. One morning around 5am 22 year old Susan DaLucci of Kittery Maine, woke up with a painful need to urinate. At first she thought she had diarrhoea, but when she stood up out of bed, she realised that it was urinary pain. It was very similar to the feeling of having diarrhoea, just out the wrong hole. She wobbled to the toilet and upon sitting on it, her vagina erupted into the most horrific messy farting noise anyone has ever heard. In paralysing pain, Ms. DeLucci for the next few minutes continued to push and squirt out of her vagina a burning tide of wretch and filth while she gripped the sides of the toilet, white-knuckled. She was screaming wildly, and the neighbours called the police. When medics arrived they found Ms. DeLucci unconscious lying on the floor of her bathroom wearing nothing but her bath robe. Running down her leg, was a stream of brown and green syrup. The medic had to transfer her to a stretcher, so he grabbed her left leg which was bent crossing her other leg, to straighten her out. When he lifted her left leg to straighten her body out, he exposed her vagina at which point a creature, no larger than the tip of a finger wormed its way out of her genitals and landed on the floor with a wet popping sound. Shocked, the medic stared at the creature that was lying on the tiles of the bathroom floor in a casing of mucous. It was a tiny mud shrimp and it sat there on the cold floor gasping for water while flipping itself back and forth. The horrified medic turned to the toilet as he felt the nausea setting in. When he put his face down into the toilet to puke what he saw was so horrific that to this day he cannot look into a toilet without convulsing. The entire toilet bowl was boiling with baby brown mud shrimp flipping and splashing at a furious pace. If you think that is bad - wait until you hear how it happened: Ms. DeLucci's official death was the result of a combination of shock and severe head trauma. She stood up over the toilet in pain and when she saw what she had done, she went into shock and fell, smashing her head on the toilet and then on the floor. It is believed by medical police that on two nights before the accident she had purchased a live lobster at a fish market. While lying in a tub, she gently inserted the creature's tail into her vagina to derive pleasure. At that point, she held a lighter under the creature's face causing it to flip its tail in a violent snapping motion. The medics found a lesbian XXX video in the VCR and the TV was positioned on a table in front of the tub. The lobster was found in the kitchen garbage can wrapped in a paper bag. Traces of Ms. DeLucci's DNA were found on the lobster along with pubic hairs that had wedged themselves between the lobster tail joints. The lobster's face was lightly burned with the same fuel used in lighters. The lobster's digestive track and colon were found to be full of mud and egg casings. Doctors believe that the lobster had eaten them (they are common in the water at fish markets and are usually harmlessly boiled to death) and the lobster had crapped them out into Ms. DeLucci's c**t when she was torturing it. Maine mud shrimp only take two days to gestate and Ms. DeLucci was only four days away from getting her period, doctors believe that at that point of her menstrual cycle, her womb was the perfect PH balance to grow these mud shrimp which are a much larger version of the popular "Sea Monkey" pets sold throughout the US. Over night the eggs had hatched and the mud shrimp began doubling in size every ten minutes. You can imagine the pain she was in when she woke up that morning and gave birth to well over 1,000 mud shrimp in her toilet.
I LOVE MAYO
A woman had been absent from college for a number of weeks. When she returned one of her close friends was curious as to why she had been sick for so long. The following story emerged. The woman and her boyfriend enjoyed involving food in their foreplay, mars bars, cream, syrup, gravy, peanut butter, you name it. One day the boyfriend, before going to work, made his sandwiches for the day, tuna mayonnaise leaving the leftover tuna Mayo lying out on the kitchen top. He went to work, came home, had dinner and relaxes in for a night in with his girlfriend. Time passes and the pair of them get in the mood and start "doing the do". The boyfriend leaps up, after yodelling in the canyon for a while, and remembers the tuna Mayo. He gets the tuna Mayo off the kitchen table begins to slap it all over his girlfriend's body (applying voluminous amounts to her vaginal area) and starts to lick it off. Two days later after their night of tuna Mayo lust has passed, the couple start to feel very ill. The boyfriend first, he seems to be unable to stop vomiting and the girlfriend later who keeps on getting severe stomach cramps. The boyfriend puts this down to eating the tuna Mayo that had been lying out uncovered all day, and sure enough his jippy belly soon eases off after day or so. His girlfriend, however, continues to feel ill, her pain worsening and her abdominal area becoming increasingly sore and tender. This goes on for a few more days until the girlfriend can't even get out of her bed for the pain in her crotch and abdominal area. So her boyfriend takes her to the doctors, who recommends she see a gynaecologist. Thinking she may have cervical cancer, the gynaecologist checks her out and to his horror discovers far inside the woman's vagina is a swarm of maggots that have been eating into her upper vaginal cavity. Apparently what happened was the tuna Mayo, after being left uncovered, in the sun, attracted a number of flies, who naturally laid their eggs, which the boyfriend ate and the girlfriend incubated.
NO MAYOs PLEASE
A woman went through the drive- thru of Burger King for lunch a couple of years ago. She ordered a chicken sandwich (the breaded kind...before spicy chicken or grilled chicken became big sellers for BK) and specifically requested NO MAYO because she couldn't stand the stuff. She drove away without confirming that she got what she ordered. As she drove, she began to eat the sandwich and realised that there was Mayo on. She was none too pleased but was so hungry that she ate it anyway. When she got about halfway through the sandwich, she began to feel very ill. She stopped eating the sandwich but felt increasingly worse as she continued to drive. She felt so bad that she drove herself to the hospital emergency room. She took her sandwich with her since she started feeling bad after eating the sandwich. The hospital performed tests on both her and the sandwich and found out the following... The sandwich actually didn't have any Mayo on it. In reality, the chicken had a tumour on its breast. When the chicken was breaded and fried, the tumour burst inside the breaded chicken breast. The Mayo-like substance was actually puss from the tumour. Kind of makes you want to swear off fast food and Mayo, doesn't it!
TACO BELL STORY
This girl was really in a hurry one day so she just stopped off at a Taco Bell and got a Chicken soft taco and ate it on the way home. That night she noticed her jaw was kind of tight and swollen. The next day it was a little worse so she went to her doctor. He said she was just having an allergic reaction to something and gave her some cream to rub on her jaw. After a couple of days the swelling had just gotten worse and she could hardly move her jaw. She went back to her doctor to see what was wrong. Her doctor had no idea so he started to run some tests. They scrubbed out the inside of her mouth to get tissue samples and they also took some saliva samples. Well, they found out what was wrong. Apparently her chicken soft taco had a pregnant cockroach in the one she ate!!!! The eggs then somehow got into her saliva glands and she was incubating them. They had to remove a couple layers of her inner mouth to get all the eggs out. If they hadn't figured out what was going on, the eggs would have hatched inside the lining of her mouth.
